Animal Puns

Get your paws, claws and fins on these funny animal puns.

Calling all cat, dog, reptile, fish, and bird lovers! These hilarious animal puns such as our cat pun and dog puns, and animal jokes such as our cat jokes and dog jokes will make your day whether you’re at work, home or at the vet.

Horse Rider

To be or not to be a horse rider, that is equestrian. —Mark Simmons, comedian

Animal in the Car

Q: What do you call an animal you keep in your car?

A: A Carpet

Sharing A Crab

Q: Why did the crab never share? A: Because he's shellfish

After a fish shares his opinion

Let minnow what you think.

When all the catnip is gone

You have cat to be kitten me right now.

A whale is always right

Whale, whale, whale...look who was right again.  

When a hawk falls off a branch

Well, this is hawkward.

When an otter needs personal space

Get otter here!

Seal jokes

That's the sealiest thing I've ever heard!

Lonely Owl

I'm owl by myself.

Annoying Giraffe

You're giraffing me crazy.

Panda Madness

This is pandamonium!

When a dolphin makes a mistake…

I didn't do it on porpoise.

Shellfish Loans

Q. Where do shellfish go to borrow money? A. The prawn broker.

Confused Dolphin

Q. What does a dolphin say when he’s confused? A. Can you please be more Pacific?

I’ve had it—up to my neck

Q: What did the giraffe say when her neighbor wouldn't stop talking? A: You're giraffing me crazy!

Hello to you too

Q: What is every whale's favorite greeting? A: Whale hello there!

Awkward encounters

Q: What did the bird watcher say when she mistook a hawk for an eagle? A: Well, this is hawkward

Apologies to the porpoise

Q: What did the dolphin say after he accidentally swam into another sea creature? A: I didn't do it on porpoise

Relationship issues

Q: What did the wild cat couple yell during their argument? A: "You're such a cheetah!" "No, you're lion!"

Fishy thoughts

Q: How do fish end their work emails? A: Let minnow what you think.

Top hits on the farm

Q: What is every goat's favorite Haddaway song? A: What is love? Baby don't herd me

Bird dating

Q: What did the flamingo post on her dating profile? A: Single and ready to flamingle

When a pony has a sore throat

Do you have water? I'm a little horse.

When a grizzly means business

Stand back, or I'll beat you with my bear hands!

Swimming preferences

Q: Why do seals swim in salt water? A: Because pepper water makes them sneeze

Shut down your haters

Hippo 1: You're fat. Hippo 2: That's very hippo-critical.

A feline in disbelief

You have cat to be kitten me right meow.

Emotional farm animals

Q: What do you get if you cross an angry sheep and a moody cow? A: An animal that's in a baaaaaaaaad mooooooooooood.

A cowboy’s best friend

Q: Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? A: Someone told him to get a long little doggie.

What do sea lions say when they hear a bad joke?

That's the seal-iest thing I've ever heard.

Elephant Vacation

Q: What did the baby elephant ask his mom before they left for vacation? A: "Can I borrow a suitcase? I only have a little trunk."

Toad Parking

Q: What did the toad say when he parked illegally? A: "Just waiting for the bus because my car got toad."

Alpaca Outing

Want to go on a picnic? Alpaca lunch.

Cowboy Dog

Q: Why did the cowboy buy a dachshund? A: Someone told him to get a long little doggy.

Seal Jokes

Q: What did the seal say when his friend told him a joke? A: That's the sealiest thing I've ever heard!

Whale Greeting

Whale hello there!

Off to College

Q: What did the Buffalo say to his son when he went off to college? A: Bison

Bear Ears

Q: What would bears be without Bees? A: Ears

Koala Bear

What do you mean I'm not a bear? I have all of the koalafications!